Bebop and Rocksteady - Vidiots - P. A. Nolte

This is set during the last few minutes of Turtles Forever. Shredder has been defeated.  The world of the Mirage TMNT has been saved, as have all worlds that are occupied by a version of the TMNT, but not all the loose ends have been tied up.

1/ On an enormous screen with an inordinate amount of buttons, levers, dials, and keyboards strewn haphazardly across its console is a timeline depicting various versions of The Shredder.  The Mirage Shredder, his three mutated clones, the shark worm clone, the Utrom Ch'rell, his 2012 cartoon version, the 1990 movie version, the sad guy who heckles kids from the Coming Out of Our Shells tour, and so many more can all be represented.  At the controls are the familiar 1987 Fred Wolf cartoon Bebop and Rocksteady.  These are Bebop and Rocksteady Prime.

Rocksteady:  You think we can pick up interdimensional cable on the boss's TV?

Bebop:  -snort-  I dunno, Rock.  What's this button do?

2/ The screen switches to various versions of Krang.  He has fewer versions than Shredder, but they tend to be far more menacing.  Bebop and Rocksteady are having difficulty with the console, scratching their heads and fighting over who stands where.

Rocksteady: Stop messing around!  I wanna watch The Adventures of Stealy.

Bebop: Uh... You do it!  -snort-  These controls don't work!

3/ The screen switches again, this time depicting a measly four versions of Bebop and Rocksteady: The 1987 Fred Wolf versions, same as the two who stand at the console, versions from the Mutant Turtles: Chōjin Densetsu-hen OAV, versions from IDW's current comic, and the mutated Steranko and Zeck from the current cartoon.  Bebop stops messing with the console when Rocksteady points at the screen.

Rocksteady: Waitaminute, Bop!  Look!

Bebop: Hey, yeah!  -snort-  Cool!

4/ At the console, with the screen still stuck on their transdimensional doppelgangers, Bebop and Rocksteady high five.

Rocksteady: Ha ha!  They don't make too many like us, huh?

Bebop:  -snort-  You can say that again, Rock!  Ha!

Raphael (OP): Laugh it up, lamebrains.

5/ Bebop and Rocksteady have their backs to the screen, their hands up, surrendering without a second thought.  At the edge of the panel, pointed towards the villainous duo, are glimpses of all four of the Turtles' weapons.

Rocksteady: Aw, man...

Bebop: Looks like we're gonna have to wait for  -snort- syndication...

Bebop and Rocksteady: "Which Came First"--David Press.

PAGE ONE.

A full-page splash: of Bebop, Rocksteady, Casey Jones, and DONATELLO playing hockey in a skating rink.

            Casey Jones has been mutated into a giant GOALIE.

            Bebop and Rocksteady are small, kid-like, versions of their mutated selves.

            Donatello is, of course, his normal self.

            The way I’m seeing these versions of the characters is slightly in the Skottie Young style of play, or the animated series. Like this is a cover for an issue of TMNT.

1.CAPTION:           So which came first:

2.CAPTION:           The rhino, the hockey player, the warthog, or the Turtle?

3.CAPTION:           …

4.CAPTION:           Doesn’t matter.

--END--

Bebop and Rocksteady - Turtle Hunting Antics - Perry Kent

I am still on the road, but this is what I whipped up. Hope it's tubular.

Panel 1
Interior, dark, abandoned sewer tunnel. Bebop and Rocksteady walk through an abandoned sewer tunnel. They are both angry and arguing.

1. ROCKSTEADY: Do you know the way out?
2. BEBOP: Me?! It was your idea to come down here, turtle hunting. You were leading!
3. BEBOP: You moron!

Panel 2
Rocksteady faces Bebop, ready to charge at him. He is furious.

4. ROCKSTEADY: Don’t call me a moron!
5. BEBOP: Then don’t be such a moron!

Panel 3
Bebop dodges out of the way as Rocksteady smashes into the wall.

6. ROCKSTEADY: AHHHH!
7. SFX (wall): WHAM!

Panel 4
Interior, bright, subway station. Rocksteady smashes through the wall of the subway station.

8. SFX (wall): CRAAASH!

Panel 5
Bebop steps through the hole in the subway station wall as Rocksteady rubs his head.

9. BEBOP: That’s using your head!

Bebop and Rocksteady – Bebop and Rocksteady Vs The Universe

(Bebop and Rocksteady have been abducted from Earth and, through a series of events, found themselves in the midst of an intergalactic wrestling circuit.)

(5 Panels)

Panel 1: ROCKSTEADY stands on the ‘ropes’ of the ring, playing to the crowd. He’s wearing a stylized version of his normal outfit that looks more like a pro-wrestling costume.

The sci-fi nature of the ring means that the ropes are actually some kind of blue glowing elastic hard energy, and that the traditional square shape of the ring is actually circular, with no posts, just a series of floating ‘buoys’ that keep the ‘ropes’ in place.

CROWD: DROP THE ROCK! DROP THE ROCK!

ROCKSTEAD: YeeeEEEAAAHHHHHH!

Panel 2: ROCKSTEADY looks to BEBOP, who is standing half-way between the ROCKSTEADY and an orange, four-armed muscular alien who’s on the mat trying to recover. Like ROCKSTEADY, BEBOP is wearing a wrestling-stylized version of his normal outfit.

ALIEN: (Mumbling) grrrr…crazy punks…

ROCKSTEADY: Hear that, Beebs?

BEBOP: Better give ‘em what they want!

Panel 3: BEBOP holds his arms up in the air, letting ROCKSTEADY jump onto them in an elbow-drop pose.

CROWD: BEBOP! ROCKSTEADY!

Panel 4: The ALIEN picks himself up as BEBOP stomps his way over while holding ROCKSTEADY above him.

CROWD: BEBOP! ROCKSTEADY!

Panel 5: BEBOP throws ROCKSTEADY down on top of the ALIEN for a high-impact elbow drop move.

SFX: THUNK-A!!!

CROWD: YEAAAAAAAHHH!

(END PAGE)

Bebop and Rocksteady - Knock-Down, Drag-Out - Grant McLaughlin

Shredder has been hunting the Ninja Turtles, and they've recently gone underground, keeping a low profile.  Frustrated, Shredder responds.

1 - The food court of a busy mall.  People are all about, noshing at tables, ordering at counters, and walking to and from stores.  They are happy and calm.

CAPTION (SHREDDER): They are weapons, like any other.

2 - Bebop and Rocksteady smash through a wall in the food court, bowling their way into the middle of the everything.  People nearby dive out of the way, panic starting.

CAPTION (SHREDDER): It's not a question of strengths and weaknesses.

3 - Close on Bebop and Rocksteady as they wade through the scene, causing destruction and chaos.  Bebop swats a nearby man out of his way, sending him flying.  Rocksteady crushes a nearby table and screams at everyone around him, spittle flying from his enraged mouth.

ROCKSTEADY (1): Turtles!

ROCKSTEADY (2): Come out, come out, wherever you are!

CAPTION (SHREDDER): But in how you employ them.

Why Bebop and Rocksteady?

Nostalgia - You're Doing It Right

It could be because there’s a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie out this week which sees the pair finally get their live-action debut (and having seen the movie, I can tell you they’re one of the best parts of it). It could also have something to do with childhood nostalgia.

But there’s another aspect that’s key to why the pair is popular in the first place. In an era that seems to want villains with complex back stories, motivations we can relate to, and end goals that we can understand if not outright sympathize with, it can be easy to forget that there’s still room in the world of fiction who far simpler to understand and do away with efforts to complicate the nature of what makes them a bad guy.

Villains like Bebop and Rocksteady. Villains who, while not without their redeeming qualities (such as undying loyalty to their boss and camaraderie towards each other), are just good old fashion bad guys. They don’t have complex motivations, they don’t have backstories designed to make us understand them or why they’re villains, and they certainly don’t have goals that could be honorable or worthwhile if only they had it in them to go about it the right way.

All they really want is to make their boss happy, cause some chaos and mischief, wreck up the place, have a good time, and otherwise not bother to worry about pesky things like laws and order.

Please, those things are for chumps.

Bebop & Rocksteady – they’re simple criminal knuckleheads, but they’re our lovable simple criminal knuckleheads.

Never change, you two.