D4VE - Self Improvement Is Masturbation, Now Self Destruction Is The Answer - Ryan K. Lindsay

PANEL ONE
Establishing shot of D4VE's garage.

SFX: TUNK

SFX: plink

PANEL TWO
Shot of D4VE, mood lit from above, whiskey bottle nearby, inside the garage. We cannot see his hands here.

Caption: ...

PANEL THREE
D4VE raises a gnarly hammer above his head with his left hand.

D4VE: Fuck you.

PANEL FOUR
D4VE smashes the hammer down, we don't see what on.

SFX: TUNK

PANEL FIVE
D4VE takes a sip of his drink with his left hand.

D4VE: ugh

PANEL SIX
D4VE puts a new metal hand into the end of his right wrist.

SFX: plink

PANEL SEVEN
D4VE flexes the hand in front of his face.

D4VE: Fuck you.

PANEL EIGHT
We cut across to a pile of mangled hands in the corner of the garage.

D4VE (op): Fuck all you.

PANEL NINE
Black panel.

SFX: TUNK

D4VE - The Matrix of Binary Delights - Brian Manton

1.

D4VE is dragged by his partner-bot, S4LLY, through the corridors of a high class hotel.

D4VE: It’s just not my format.

S4LLY: Our sex life is BSOD. We’re doing this, D4VE.

2.

They stop outside an ornate double-door. A large jar, filled with USB keys of various size and colour, rests on a side-table by the door. S4LLY drops her USB key, complete with Atari keychain, into the jar.

D4VE: I don’t think I’m the render farm type.

S4LLY: Well there’s no rebooting now.

3.

S4LLY and D4VE enter to a scene that neither of them were prepared for.

It is a full on Robot Orgy - far more intricate and depraved than either of them could have expected. Like a technological version of Hieronymus Bosch’s “The Garden of Earthly Delights”.

A sea of extension cables, adaptor sockets and patch bays. Jump leads and car batteries. Voltmeters. Electromagnets. A-batteries being forced where only AAA’s should fit.

Cans of WD40 litter the floor.

D4VE: [Windows Hourglass]

S4LLY: [Mac Spinning Wheel]

D4VE - ...B3CAUSE D1N05AURS. - R.A. Wonsowski

Layout: 3 rows of 2

Panel 1 - D4VE sits relaxed on a park bench in Central Park, NYC, his back to the New York City Skyline in the background. It's a blue-sky, sunny day and all is right and cheerful.

NO COPY


Panel 2 - Same as Panel 1, except the buildings and trees are vibrating.

OFF-PANEL:  ROOAAARRR!!!!!


Panel 3 - Same as above, except buildings start to shatter as GINORMOUS ROBOTIC KAIJU versions of the DINOSAURS from Disney's Fantasia start fighting.

reference

TYRANNOSAUR:  RRAAAAARRRRR!!!!

Panel 4 - They continue to fight as they exit to the right.  D4VE hangs his head low in despair.  Buildings begin to fall over.

SoundFX:  rrrRRUUMMBBLLLLLeee

Sound FX:  KSSHH!!!!

Panel 5 - Same as above, but the dinosaurs are completely gone from the panel.  D4VE looks completely dejected.

OFF-PANEL:  CRASH!!!!!!!

Panel 6 - D4VE, his body language looking depressed, begins rolling up his shirt sleeves as he walks off after the dinosaurs, ready (kinda) to take them on.

D4VE:  ...I'm getting too old for this 5H1T.

D4VE - Night On The Town - Niel Jacoby

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Panel 1: D4VE is waking up in a back alley, clearly roughed up.

D4VE: WHAT THE?
(link)
*sigh*... REPLAY.

Panel 2: D4VE's memory replay. He is taking many shots of oil, a crowd around him. These replay shots are all from D4VE's perspective.

Crowd: 1! 10! 11! 100! 101! 110! 111! 1000! (AND SO ON)

Panel 3: Corrupted, warped footage, FILE CORRUPT in block letters at the bottom. We can kind of see that he's driving a car.

Panel 4: D4VE talking to a prostitute. The prostitute is obviously sick of his shit

D4VE: COME ON, SAY IT!

Prostitute: I'D RATHER NOT.

D4VE: COME OOOOOOOON!

Prostitute:  FIIIIIIIINE. DEAD OR ALIVE, YOU'RE CUMMING IN ME!

Panel 5: More corrupted footage. We can see a little bit of what he's doing, and it's sex. again, FILE CORRUPT in block letters.

Speech bubble: (INAUDIBLE) SPOOGE, CREEP!

Panel 6: D4VE's head is flying into the air, and we see through its eyes as it looks downward on D4VE in a robot fighting ring, his headless body flying backward from a punch from a big blue boxing robot.

PA: YOU KNOCKED HIS BLOCK OFF!

Panel 7: black panel, END OF REPLAY in white block letters.

Panel 8: D4VE back in the alley.

D4VE: FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK. FUCK*10^25.

D4ve – Electric Sheep – Shaun Richens.

PAGE ONE – 5 PANELS

1.1

PAGE WIDE PANEL. A monstrously large alien beast lies unconscious in the road. Smashed and abandoned cars line the street.

D4VE stands atop the beast in full hero mode. He looks confident and cool, he casually leans his elbow on the butt of an infeasibly big chrome gun.

A crowd has gathered. They listen silently as D4ve speaks. Looking up at him like a god.

D4VE:

...And the day is won.

Once again metal is mightier than flesh.

1.2

PAGE WIDE PANEL. Repeat of 1.1 The crowd have erupted into cheers and chanting.

D4VE has dropped his head, looking to the floor. His eye closed. One arm raised in the air fist closed (Think Judd Nelson at the end of The Breakfast Club) D4ve is loving every, single second of this.

THE CROWD:

D4VE. D4VE. D4VE. D4VE.

1.3

Close up on hero D4VE.

S4LLY(O.P):

D4ve

1.4

The blurry outline of S4LLY as she leans over the couch. We're looking at her from the couch. From D4VES POV.

S4LLY:

Boot the fuck up D4ve, you're guna be late for work.

1.5

Birds eye view. Looking straight down onto D4VE. He lies on the couch. One arm behind his head. He's still wearing his shirt from the day before.

D4VE:

Job damn.

D4ve – Careful What You /Ask: For – MK Stangeland Jr.

(4 Panels)

(Lead In explanation – an alien race finds Earth, and after taking a look at it from orbit for a while, come to a conclusion that’s more or less in line with the ‘robots killed off humans’ back story of the comic. Which, in the aliens minds, means that the robots are dangerous and need to be terminated. So they called in)

Panel 1: A handful of alien capital ships are in orbit over Earth and shooting lasers down at the planets surface.

SXF: Pew! PEW! Pew!

Panel 2: A heavily fortified military bunker underneath Earth’s surface where officers and soldiers are rushing about as they try to coordinate in response to what’s going on above them somehow.

General H0g4n: We need all forces! Call up EVERYONE, active, inactive, retired, EVERYONE!

Panel 3: Close up on D4VE, where we can only see his head without knowing what’s around him.

D4VE (1): Yes?

D4VE (2): Uh-huh.

D4VE (3): I see…

D4VE (4): Where am I?

Panel 4: Wide shot of D4VE as he tries to escape the city as it is getting blow up around him.

D4VE: I’m currently a little busy trying not to die, actually.

(END PAGE)

D4VE - Up In Arms - Grant McLaughlin

All word balloons in the imagined scenes would be little images instead of actual dialogue.  Until the final panel, every panel should be framed so that D4VE is in profile and the reader can only ever see the right side of his body.  And if you can have D4VE in a similar positioning from panel to panel, that would be an added bonus.

1 - S4LLY and D4VE are in the kitchen, sitting at the table having their oil and Iron Loops.  S4LLY asks D4VE a question, which causes him to look up at the ceiling in frustration.

S4LLY: I see you haven't been to the shop yet.

D4VE: S4LLY, you know how I feel about the shop.

2 - Switch scene to an imagined waiting room.  There are a few robots sitting and waiting.  D4VE slouches on his chair, his head back in utter boredom.  The receptionist-bot calls out some other robots.

CAPTION (D4VE): They always call all the other robots before me.

RECEPTIONIST-BOT: [image of a robot's head followed by a question mark] [image of a different robot's head followed by a question mark]

3 - Now in an imagined doctor's office, which for robots is actually an individual-sized mechanic's garage.  The doctor robot should be sleek and perhaps on the smaller side to emphasize her newness.  Her clothing is a mixture between a doctor and a mechanic, wearing a stereotypical head mirror and mechanic jumpsuit, for example.  The doctor looks at her tablet for information on D4VE.  For his part, D4VE is sitting on a robot-sized car lift, wearing a hospital gown, once again slouching with his head back in utter boredom.

CAPTION (D4VE): And once I finally get to see someone, it's invariably some know-it-all model whose barely off the shelf they're so new.

DOCTOR: [big exaggerated ellipses]

4 - Still in the imagined doctor's office.  The appointment is over and D4VE and the doctor are shaking hands.  Like the earlier panels, D4VE has his head back in boredom / frustration.

CAPTION (D4VE): Who then proceed to charge me an arm and a leg to tell me what I already know.

DOCTOR: [dollar signs]

5 - Back in the kitchen.  Similar panel to panel 1.  D4VE could actually be looking at S4LLY in this instance (or perhaps at his bowl of Iron Loops).

S4LLY: They also usually fix what's wrong with you.

D4VE: I'm making do.

6 - Same scene, but the angle is switched slightly.  It is now obvious that D4VE's left arm is not attached to his body.  Indeed, it's sitting next to him on the table, detached and in rough shape.  S4LLY looks at him deadpanly; D4VE nonchalantly has a drink of oil.

S4LLY: Your arm's off, D4VE.

D4VE: Yeah, my left arm.

D4VE - 54GE 4DV1CE - Ben Rosenthal

1.  5COTTY is sitting in his room with various amounts of metal tube surrounding him.  Some are joined together while others lay on the floor.  5COTTY is holding some blueprints in his hand, frustrated as he trie to work out how to put the contraption together.  The door to 5COTTY's room is ajar, with D4VE peeking through.

5COTTY
Damn stupid crap.


2.  D4VE is walking in to the room, seeing an opportunity to bond with his son.

D4VE
Whatchya got there?  Need a hand?

5COTTY
Privacy man!


3.  Close up of D4VE with the instructions in his hand.  As he is holding them up we can see through the paper what the contraption is - it's a long set of tubes hooked up to a robot head - it's a blow job machine.  He is shocked by what 5COTTY is building.

D4VE
Is this.......what is this?

5COTTY
Yeah it's an SSB.  You gonna ground me now?


4.  D4VE is looking at the instructions, registering how it works.  He is looking over the details of it, thinking.


5.  D4VE is handing the instructions back to 5COTTY.

D4VE
Let me have a go when it's done.

Clean it first though.

D4VE - G00D F04 N0THING ... M4Y8E S0M3THING - Simon McDonald

1.
FR4NK is sitting behind his desk at the Water-Power Plant, arms folded. FISH3R is behind him, standing, matching the aggressive pose. A scrawny robot is sitting on the other side of the desk, pensive. Clearly an outdated model. Rusted, chipped, in terrible condition. He doesn't have fingers; he has vacuums for hands.

FR4NK

- - checked your RAM, P4T, and I've got to say - -

FISH3R

It's terrible.

FR4NK

- - it's the worst. The absolute worst.

2.

On P4T.

P4T

Well, I - -

3.

FR4NK has his hand raised, silencing P4T, going for earnest, not quite able to pull it off

FR4NK

I mean, look, I appreciate your history.

Some bot's got to do the menial work, right?

Not your fault that's what you were programmed for.

4.

Tighter on FR4NK.

FR4NK

But my secretary - -

FISH3R

Executive secretary.

FR4NK

- - my executive secretary - - 

- - needs to at least seven upgrades higher than you.

FISH3R

At least.

5.

P4T is despondent. FR4NK seems to take pity on him.

FR4NK

Now, I may be heartless, but that doesn't mean I don't admire

sturdy programming and durability.

I think your specs are perfect for another role.

6.

Cut to D4V3's office. He's on a call. His thumb and pinkie are extended - mimicking a phone. P4T is behind him. Vacuuming, because that's all he can do, which is no help to anyone.

SFX

Vmmmmmmmmm

D4V3

- - no, that's not static, it's - -

- - my secretary, yes, he's a - -

- - no, he, uh - -

- - he won't stop.





Why D4VE?

D4VE is a series from Monkeybrain Comics, penned by Ryan Ferrier and illustrated by Valentin Ramon, about a former hero who used to fight monsters and aliens while protecting the planet, but having vanquished his enemies, now finds the monotony of everyday life grinding him down, stuck in a soul-sucking desk job as an account manager for the water power-plant, suffering through an epic mid-life crisis.

D4VE is a robot. Who lives on an Earth inhabited solely by robots. Because, seriously now, in the final confrontation between man and machine, flesh and bone loses every time. But with all his battles won, D4V3 is lost, pining over his glory days.

Based on the first two issues, D4VE may get the opportunity to live them. But not without dealing with the mess he’s made of his family and professional life.

Part action/adventure, part comedy, D4V3 is a brilliantly innovative sci-fi comic from two creators you should definitely keep an eye on. Let’s see if the Thoughtballooners can do their robot hero justice!