Musicals – Deadpool LIVE! (But Not Really!): An Epic Musical Extravaganza Event! – MK Stangeland, Jr.

(5 Panels)

(Note – All panels below should be done as if they were taking place inside an indoor theater of some kind.)

Panel 1: DEADPOOL – technically, an actor dressed as DEADPOOL – rides down and across the theater from the back to the stage on a line of some kind. He’s dressed up in full costume, with an Elvis-style costume over it, he’s carrying a guitar that he at least looks like he’s playing, the guitar should resemble a prop ax weapon. Attached to his back by some sort of pole or stick, pointing out to the side, is a yellow box with words written on each side.

SFX: (Epic Music Notes)

YELLOW BOX: Behold my epicness!

MUSIC: (Sung) DEAD-POOL!

Panel 2: DEADPOOL actor lands on the stage amongst the assembled chorus in a way that faces out toward the audience. ‘Ninjas’ – stage crew dressed up to match the background – remove the YELLOW BOX from Panel 1.

A pair of blank screens are in the background, one of which is currently showing a yellow box.

SFX: (Epic Music Notes)

MUSIC (1): (Sung) This is, his show;

MUSIC (2): (Sung) It’s DEAD-POOL!

YELLOW BOX: Aaaaand nailed the landing!

Panel 3: The Chorus pulls the ‘Elvis’ outer costume off ‘DEADPOOL’ as the pull away and dance into the background, leaving ‘DEADPOOL’ in just his classic red and black.

SFX: (Epic Music Notes)

DEADPOOL: (Sung) The star you deserve has arrived!

YELLOW BOX: (With singing) You did paid for him, after all!

Panel 4: ‘DEADPOOL’ leans in towards the audience.

SFX: (Epic Music Notes – Downplayed)

DEADPOOL (1): But just between you and me, I’m not actually Deadpool.

YELLOW BOX: Ha! Joke’s on you!

DEADPOOL (2): The real Deadpool is a very busy man, so he hired me to fill in for him.

Panel 5: The DEADPOOL actor starts walking back as he plays the guitar he’s holding; the chorus and backup singers and dancers move forward again to fill in around him.

SFX: (Epic Music Notes)

DEADPOOL: But let’s just keep that between us!

YELLOW BOX: Or else!

(END PAGE)

She-Hulk – The Red Green Show (Part x) – MK Stangeland, Jr.

(6 Panels)

Panel 1: Post-Chaos. Both SHE-HULK and DEADPOOL are sitting on something that passes for a bench as collateral damage lies all around them, both look worse for the wear and in serious need of a breather after a rather spectacular fight of some kind.

Panel 2: Continuation of PANEL 1, as SHE-HULK and DEADPOOL continue to sit there.

YELLOW BOX: Well that happened.

SHE-HULK: *angry grunt*

Panel 3: Further continuation of PANELS 1 and 2. SHE-HULK reaches up and grabs YELLOW BOX (2), noticeably crushing it with her grip.

DEADPOOL (1): (Thought Balloon) Did we actually accomplish anything?

YELLOW BOX (1): We accomplished entertainment, that’s what we accomplished!

DEADPOOL (2): (Thought Balloon) Ah, right.

DEADPOOL (3): (Thought Balloon) So who’s ready for Round 2?

YELLOW BOX (2): In bed, maybe. If you know what I mean.

DEADPOOL (4): Bow chica bOW! OW! OW!

Panel 4: SHE-HULK swings YELLOW BOX (2) from PANEL 3 at DEADPOOL like a club in a one-handed backhand, the rest of her body hardly moving. DEADPOOL goes flying into the air and into the background at high speed as result.

SFX: HULKSLAPPED!

Panel 5: SHE-HULK remains sitting as she breaks YELLOW BOX (2) from PANEL 3 across her knee as DEADPOOL lands somewhere in the background behind the rubble and destruction beyond where we can see.

SFX: (From PANEL 3 YELLOW BOX (2)) wrr-ECKED!

SFX: (From DEADPOOL landing) thd

Panel 6: SHE-HULK tosses the two halves of PANEL 3 YELLOW BOX (2) aside.

DEADPOOL: (Far in the background, not actually seen) ow

(END PAGE)

Blind Al – Blind Logic – MK Stangeland Jr.

(6 Panels)

Panel 1: DEADPOOL is at BLIND AL’s house. Her sunglasses have been replaced with some kind of high-tech version that allows her to see. A fresh, hot pot of coffee is stationed nearby.

DEADPOOL (1): There’s something different about you.

YELLOW BOX: Is it a new haircut? It’s a new haircut.

BLIND AL (1): Oh, you noticed my new sight glasses.

BLIND AL (2): The best in artificial sight technology, built off of years of superhero shenanigans.

DEADPOOL (2): That was going to be my second guess.

Panel 2: AL ‘accidentally’ – but not really – knocks the coffee over so that it lands on DEADPOOL.

DEADPOOL: EEEE!

AL (1): Whoops!

AL (2): Sorry, I’m still getting use to them.

Panel 3: DEADPOOL stands near a dartboard. The dartboard, however, is empty – the darts, being thrown by AL, have all hit DEADPOOL in the chest instead.

DEADPOOL: GAH!

AL: My bad!

Panel 4: A wrapped CHIMICHANGA that AL was tossing to DEADPOOL goes wide – it flies in his general direction, but not close enough that DEADPOOL could actually be expected to catch it.

AL (1): Oops!

AL (2): Silly me.

Panel 5: A car being driven by AL runs over DEADPOOL.

SFX: THWUNK!

Panel 6: A highly beat-up DEADPOOL lies on the ground, it’s pretty clear that if he wasn’t DEADPOOL, the impact from AL hitting him with her car would have killed him. BLIND AL stands over him.

AL: Sorry, Wade, I didn’t see you there.

YELLOW BOX: I’m starting to get the impression that Al’s not being honest about her glasses.

(END PAGE)

Deadpool - Serious - Arby Moay

Panel 1

We look at the back of a man, standing, whose head had just been sliced clean off with a sword. In the space between where the neck and head split, we see Deadpool's eyes. He is pissed.

CAPTION (Yellow): Life, sometimes, is terrible...

Panel 2

Deadpool stalks towards a dude leaning on the closed doors of a car. The dude is pointing a pistol at Deadpool and shooting. Deadpool just shrugs off the bullets entering his body.

CAPTION (Yellow): Even I'm sane enough to realize that sometimes.

SFX (gunshot): BLAM! BLAM! BLAM!

CAPTION (Yellow): And sometimes, the monsters of this world don't need super powers. 

Panel 3

Deadpool sticks his sword through the dude's head.

CAPTION (Yellow): Sometimes, the most ordinary human can do the shittiest thing...

Panel 4

Deadpool opens the car door at the back seat and takes out a baby whose eyes glow red, and have glowing patterns in his arms. A half-eaten chimichanga rests in the dashboard of the car that Deadpool hasn't yet noticed.

CAPTION (Yellow): ...to the most innocent.

CAPTION (Yellow): It's times like these where I just --

Panel 5

Deadpool notices the chimichanga and perks up, baby is in his left arm, while his right arm reaches for the food.

DEADPOOL: OOOHHH! CHIMICHANGA!

CAPTION (Yellow): Wait. What was I thinking about?

CAPTION (White): I don't know, but you sounded so serious about a panel ago.

Red Hulk - Jump On Point - R.A.Wonsowski

(...ok, here's another weird one...)

Layout: double-page splash with 6 circular insets, linked by red lines to their character in the splash.

Splash -  A morning raid, chaos on the docks amid the cranes and containers at the North Korean port city of Rajin/Najin...North Korean soldiers are knocked back concussively, flying everywhere; a few struggle to find their feet.  There are two impact points - One is a crane housing in its base, the supports crumpling and exploding in a blaze of fire, bodies flying, a rocket's exhaust trail leads backward to the silhouette of a tugboat afloat on the Sea of Japan, where it originated.  The other is a crater caused by RED HULK, crouched from his sticking the landing, fists clenched, face darkened in inked blanks, his expression unreadable.  AGENT VENOM is in the foreground, firing two Desert Eagle pistols into soldiers off panel, but the muzzle flash is visible.  DEADPOOL is off to the side in the background, leaping around like a crazed Batroc, Uzi in one hand spitting bullets and mowing down soldiers, the other waving a katana.  ELEKTRA is back to back with RED HULK, her sais are in her belt loops, and she is wielding a heavy machine gun, and handling it expertly, cutting more soldiers in half.  From somewhere above, from an unseen airship, DEATH'S HEAD II rappels down midfield, firing flechettes into soldiers, as well.  Captions are from Ross's point of view.

DEATH'S HEAD II:  Seven kilometers straight below us, yes?  Access port is somewhere...


Inset 1 - Close-up, DEATH'S HEAD II.

CAPTION:  Stumbling across this alien "freelance peacekeeper" was ridiculously good luck.  Turns out the NK military eggheads stumbled across A.I.M.'s old research on the Minion Project.


Inset 2 - Close-up, DEADPOOL, who is grinning gleefully behind his mask.

CAPTION:  It was that chucklehead Wilson who volunteered us for this op.  Normally, he's a taco short of a combo plate, but the idea of human experimentation snapped to attention right quick.


Inset 3 - Mid-shot, FRANK CASTLE, a shoulder-mounted RPG-launcher visible.  He is on the tugboat, and his inset link points to its deck.

CAPTION:  Castle seconded in the next breath, when he found out slavers were producing the teenaged experimental stock.


Inset 4 - Close-up, AGENT VENOM.

CAPTION:  Corporal Thompson was the dissenter.  Pragmatic, doesn't trust anything that smacks of the off-earth, but his focus on the mission is laser-like; he and his "partner" both, cold and professional.


Inset 5 - Close-up, ELEKTRA.

CAPTION:  Ms. Natchios is here for personal reasons.  Someone named John Garrett is mixed in this somehow, and there's a storm raging beneath her calm, pale exterior.  And that's alright...


Inset 6 - Close-up, RED HULK, face silhouetted as he looks out from beneath his brow, the battle-rage upon him, but grinning toothily with anticipation for the coming fight.

CAPTION:  I've got enough anger for all of us.  And sometimes...

CAPTION:  ...sometimes I like to share it with bastards like these...

Adventure Time - ...gone HOR-ribly WRONG! - R.A. Wonsowski

Layout:
1122
3344
5566
7777

Panel 1 - Through their window we see FINN and JAKE happily fist-bump.

FINN & JAKE:  Yeah!!


Panel 2 - The "Adventure Time" title card, with FINN and JAKE holding the banner that reads "with Finn and Jake" with wings on their backs.

CAPTION (with musical notes):  Adventure Time! C'mon, grab your friends...


Panel 3 - FINN riding JAKE through the icy mountains at night, a full moon in the sky.

CAPTION (with musical notes):  We'll go to very distant lands...


Panel 4 - Floating heads of FINN and JAKE against an orange background.

CAPTION (with musical notes):  Jake the Dog, and Finn the Human...


Panel 5 - In a rainbow-laden garden of lollipops, FINN and JAKE are being brutally and savagely attacked by MILK & CHEESE, Dairy Products Gone Bad!  MILK is slashing away at JAKE with a broken whiskey bottle, and CHEESE is blathering FINN with a cast-iron skillet from behind, blood flying everywhere.  In the sky, LADY RAINICORN looks on in horror, weeping.

CAPTION (with musical notes):  ...are killed by Milk and Cheese...

LADY RAINICORN:  공포!


Panel 6 - Atop a mountain of corpses, all characters of adventure time, MILK and CHEESE raise their fists into the stormy sky, the Adventure Time logo written in the same font as any random German heavy metal band.  Among the corpses are FINN, JAKE, MARCELINE, the ICE KING, and the PRINCESS.  In an inset panel to the lower right, DEADPOOL winks at us, giving the thumbs-up.

CAPTION (with musical notes):  It's Adventure Time!

DEADPOOL:  Now DEADPOOL Approved!  Yeah!!


Panel 7 - In a conference room at ThoughtBalloons Headquarters (we know it's their HQ because the blog logo is on the wall), BEN, BRIAN, DAN, GRANT, J.D., MK, NIEL, RYAN, and SHAUN look at RAY, who is wearing a Deadpool mask, bowling shirt, jeans, and POUCHES!, in looks ranging from disapproval, to nausea and disgust, to angry disappointment.  RYAN has a "BLEAGH" look on his face, while MK and J.D. look at each other with worried concern.  GRANT has answered the phone, and cups the mouthpiece while he looks on with a smoldering fury.  RAY-slash-Deadpool has his arms wide, enthusiastically stumping for the new opening credits.  A large screen TV behind him has MILK and CHEESE running and carrying torches.

RAY/DEADPOOL:  ...oh, c'mon! It's like PRINTING money...

BRIAN (to DAN):  It's "Writer's Block Week" again, isn't it?

GRANT:  Ray, Pendleton Ward would like a word with you...

Wolverine - Boys' Night In - Niel Jacoby

111222

333444

556677

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Panel 1: Wolverine and Deadpool are sitting on opposite sides of a card table, with equal amounts of poker chips. Iceman is sitting between them, really nervous. Deadpool is moving some chips to the middle of the table.

Iceman: SO THIS IS WHAT YOU GUYS DO ON FRIDAY NIGHTS, HUH?

Wolverine: YEP.

(link)

HOW MUCH YOU BETTIN', POOL?

Deadpool: 10.

Panel 2: Wolverine moves some chips to the middle.

Wolverine: I SEE YOUR 10 AND RAISE YOU 20.

Deadpool: I CALL.

Wolverine: SAME TOO. ROLL IT.

Panel 3: Deadpool spins the chamber of a revolver.

Deadpool: LAST CHANCE TO TAKE BACK YOUR BET, HAIR-BOY.

Wolverine: NO WAY, CHEETO BREATH.

Deadpool: OK.

Panel 4: Deadpool sticks the barrel in his mouth, pointing somewhat upward.

NO COPY

Panels 5-7: close ups on the three, Deadpool first, an incredibly nervous Iceman second, a steady calm Wolverine third.

Wolverine(p5): 1...

(p6): 2...

(p7):3.

Panel 8: Deadpool pulls the trigger, blowing his brains out. Iceman is horrified, Wolverine is smirking.

SFX: BLAAOW!

Iceman: OH MY GOD

Panel 9: Wolverine moves the pot over to his side. Iceman is still on edge as Deadpool's head is beginning to heal.

Deadpool: BHEEAH SHOOO AOOOOGH CHREE?*

Caption: *"BEST 2 OUT OF 3?"

Rainbow Dash - All the Bronies in the House - R.A.Wonsowski

Layout:
1122
3344
5566
7788

Panel 1 - Night, my kitchen.  ME, staring blankly into the screen of my laptop.  I have a blank, worried look on my face, my fingers poised above the keyboard.

NO COPY


Panel 2 - Same as above, but RAINBOW DASH is now peering over my shoulder at my computer screen.  One of her eyebrows is arched in curiosity.

NO COPY


Panel 3 - Same P.O.V., but RAINBOW DASH is mildly annoyed at ME.

RAINBOW DASH:  Are you kidding me?  You can't think of ANYTHING?!?

ME:  You're not helping.


Panel 4 - Same as above, except RAINBOW DASH is smacking ME up the backside of my head in disgust.  I cringe.

SoundFX:  Thwak!

ME:  Hey!

RAINBOW DASH:  I swear to Applejack, this has been happening to you wa-ay too often lately...


Panel 5 - Same as Panel 3.  A 9-inch tall, chain-smoking TRUTH-SAYING BASTARD SPIDEY walks across the kitchen table to talk to ME and RAINBOW DASH.

TSBS:  Remember Pokemon week?  How many times have we done the bowel-disruptor gag now?

RAINBOW DASH:  (pointing at TSBS) He gets a bowel-disruptor?  Where's MY bowel-disruptor?!?


Panel 6 - Same as above, but my head is in my hands as a tiny KRYPTO floats around my head.  RAINBOW DASH looks even angrier at ME,.

KRYPTO:  He cribbed my script from an old Peanuts strip last week...

RAINBOW DASH:  You cribbed the Schulz?!?


Panel 7 - Same as above, but I'm dragging my fingers down my face, pulling down the bags under my eyes in exasperation.  A 12-inch tall SAMMY HAGAR THOR (see comments at http://www.thought-balloons.com/2012/04/why-mjolnir.html ), lightning crackling from his guitar, lands on the kitchen table.

SAMMY HAGAR THOR:  You haven't even brought me up in a year.  I got better things to do than wait on your silly @$$.

ME:  Oh for the luvva...


Panel 8 - DR. DINOSAUR and DEADPOOL, who is pointing at RAINBOW DASH happily surprised, walk in as I get up and walk out.  Everyone is talking after me as I go.

DR. DINOSAUR:  We can help you.

ME:  I'm out...

DEADPOOL:  Hey, it's Rainbow Dash!  I'm your biggest Brony!

RAINBOW DASH:  (calling worriedly after me over her shoulder) RA-A-Y!?!

Deadpool - Not A Good Week... - R.A. Wonsowski

Layout:
112
345
677

Panel 1 - A desert island missile launch area.  On the left, advancing toward us, WOLVERINE, CABLE, FANTOMEX, and PSYLOCKE, brandishing claws, oversized laser shotguns, SigSauers, and samurai swords, led by DEADPOOL, wielding a heavy assault rifle.  On the right, foreground, is BARON VON STRUCKER, surrounded by generic HYDRA soldiers.  DEADPOOL however, is looking up in the sky, holding his rifle low and not really pointing at anything.  Steam lines radiate from his head in frustration.

CAPTION:  Suddenly, Cable and X-Force spring into -

DEADPOOL:  Oh, for the luvva...CU-U-UT!!!


Panels 2 through 6:  Head and shoulders shot of DEADPOOL.  He is talking to the 4th-wall me, the writer.

Panel 2:
DEADPOOL (pointing angrily at 4th-wall me):  HEY!  Writer guy!

DEADPOOL:  HEY!!!

CAPTION (4th-wall me):   ...uh, me?

Panel 3:
DEADPOOL (head forward with "attitude"):  I don´t see any other balding failures with noisy sinuses...

DEADPOOL:  I mean, seriously, dude, what the hell?!?

CAPTION (4th-wall me):  What?

Panel 4:
DEADPOOL (pointing at Panel 1 above him with a "OMG" expression):  Oh-come-ON!  Look at this!  A whole ThoughtBalloons(TM) week dedicated to moi...

DEADPOOL:  And this is it?  Me and Hydra?!?


CAPTION (4th-wall me):  Well, now, I...


Panel 5:
DEADPOOL (finger to his "duh" face):  "Cut off one head, and two more doopity-doo!"

CAPTION (4th-wall me):  Hey, look, I'm a little off my game right now.  We all just moved back to the US.  We've been living with my mother...

Panel 6:
DEADPOOL (pleading mixed with concern):  Whoa.  The "Iron Lady", huh...?

DEADPOOL:  ...

DEADPOOL:  Well, listen, do you think we could just give it a little more gusto this time?  From the top?


Panel 7:  A desert island missile launch area tiki bar.  On the left, advancing toward us, WOLVERINE, CABLE, FANTOMEX, and PSYLOCKE the SWEDISH BIKINI TEAM, brandishing claws, oversized laser shotguns, SigSauers, and samurai swords pom poms and massage oil, led by DEADPOOL, wielding a heavy assault rifle large big-mouthed bass.  On the right, foreground, is BARON VON STRUCKER death-staring TAYLOR SWIFT, surrounded by generic HYDRA soldiers koalas with jetpacks and laser blasters.  DEADPOOL shakes his trout menacingly at TAYLOR with verve and excitement radiating from his pores.

CAPTION:  Suddenly...

DEADPOOL:  OH YEAH!!!!

Deadpool - A New Twist On An Old Favorite - Niel Jacoby

Panel 1: Deadpool, unmasked but otherwise suited up in his usual getup, is at the top of the panel, as he stands outside a circle of 6 men, each man tied to a chair with a gag in his mouth. Their placement is as follows:
    1
6     2
5     3
    4

Each man is a member of a different gang, and should be distinguished as such by their ostentatious clothing. Deadpool is holding a revolver, a 6-shooter.

DEADPOOL: LISTEN UP.
(link)
WE'RE GOING TO PLAY A LITTLE GAME. IT MAY BE A BIT CONFUSING AT FIRST...

Inset panel 1: Deadpool loads a single bullet into the revolver.

DEADPOOL: ...BUT I CAN JUST TELL...

Inset panel 2: Deadpool swipes his hand across the cylinder, spinning it.

SFX: WHRRRRRR

DEADPOOL: ...THAT YOU'LL GET THE HANG OF IT IN NO TIME.

Panel 2: Deadpool stands behind MAN 1, holding the revolver to his head and placing his other hand on his shoulder while he leans in on the side opposite the revolver, though not too close. His finger is on the trigger. The man is afraid, sweating.

Inset panel: Deadpool has his face right to MAN 1's ear, as a tear streams down MAN 1'S face.

DEADPOOL: DUCK...
SFX: KLIK

Panel 3: Deadpool has the gun to the back of MAN 2's head.

DEADPOOL: DUCK...
SFX: KLIK

Panel 4: Deadpool is clocking MAN 3 across the back of the head with the butt of the revolver. There should be some blood on the butt of the revolver and in the trail of the revolver's motion. MAN 3's head should be lurching forward from the impact, so we can't see his face.

DEADPOOL: GOOSE!
SFX: THWAKRCH!

Panel 5: Same viewpoint as Panel 1, as Deadpool jogs around the circle, with 4 images of him at different points, connected by speed lines. The first, directly at MAN 3's chair, should be mostly transparent. The second, between MAN 4 and 5, should be less so. The third, at MAN 1, should be even less so, and running backward. The fourth, between MAN 2 and 3, should be completely opaque, and be standing still, leaning on MAN 2's chair. MAN 3 is still slumped over, and the others should be horrified.

DEADPOOL 1: NA-NA-NA-BOO-BOO, BETCHA CAN'T CATCH ME!
(link)
DEADPOOL 2: BETTER HURRY, I'VE ALMOST GOT MY SECOND WIND!
(link)
DEADPOOL 3: MAYBE I SHOULD GO FOR A SECOND LAP, JUST OUT OF THE GOODNESS OF MY HEART.
(link)
DEADPOOL 4: OH, TOO BAD, SLOWPOKE.


Inset panel: Deadpool is holding the gun to MAN 3's unconscious head, while posturing nonchalantly, not even looking at the gun.

DEADPOOL: WELL, I GAVE YOU A CHANCE, BUDDY BOY, BUT IT SEEMS YOU ARE-
SFX: KLIK

Inset panel 2: Same viewpoint as previous. Deadpool walks to the next man, visibly bummed.

DEADPOOL(linked to balloon in first inset panel):-A VERY LUCKY MAN FOR NOW.

Deadpool - Skrull Hunt - J.D. Coughlan

Panel 1: Inside an evil Skrull lair. There is a conference table with several Skrulls seated around it. In the background, but incredibly obvious, is Deadpool peeking through the door.

DEADPOOL (WHITE CAP): Deadpool's secret agent log, September Tuesdayth, O-six-billion hours.

DEADPOOL (WHITE CAP): I have successfully infiltrated the Skrulls' base, located beneath that shawarma place on 59th Street.

DEADPOOL (YELLOW CAP): Good job, Agent Deadpool.

DEADPOOL: Roger.

Panel 2: From outside the conference room. Deadpool looks very pleased with himself (through his mask) as he loads a handgun.

DEADPOOL (WHITE CAP): Although I cannot say where my orders came from--

DEADPOOL (YELLOW CAP): Me. They came from me. I was bored.

DEADPOOL: Shut up!

DEADPOOL: I must stop the Skrulls' evil plan to poison the world's supply of tasty kebab meat!

Panel 3: Same, but this time we now see things as they really are. The evil lair is just the basement of the shawarma joint. The "Skrulls" through the door are just the staff in their break room. Instead of a gun, Deadpool holds a wrap filled with shawarma. The staff are looking right at Deadpool and he is reacting with surprise.

STAFF MEMBER: Um, we can hear you. And we're not Skrulls.

Inset: Close-up of Deadpool. Very serious.

DEADPOOL: It's go time!

Panel 4: Deadpool running away down the corridor, his wrap dropped behind him. His speech balloon should trail after him.

DEADPOOL: Your prices are disproportionate to the quality of your product!

DEADPOOL (YELLOW CAP): Good job, Agent DP! Now report back to base for medals and cookies!

DEADPOOL (WHITE CAP): You probably shouldn't call me "DP."

END OF PAGE

Deadpool – Juliet & John – Shaun Richens.

PAGE FOUR – 5 PANELS.

Layout

111

234

555

1.INT. Secret Underground Base of shieldwatch (An amalgamation of Shield, the D.E.O and Knightwatch) The base is located beneath New York City.

JULIET is being lead down a long sterile white corridor. Her hands cuffed behind her back. She is being pushing from behind by the man who captured her and brought her in for the SHIELDWATCH. 

The man known by the name DEAD OF NIGHT or his alias Winston Trent (This character is an amalgamation of Deadpool and Midnighter) DEAD OF NIGHT wears midnighters classic black armor with black trench coat, however he wears a black and white version of deadpools mask. Around his waist he wears two pearl handled pistols in holsters and a katana sword is slung in its scabbard over DEAD OF NIGHTS shoulder.

         DEAD OF NIGHT 1:

         So you’re kinda hot for a space chick.

         (Link)

         DEAD OF NIGHT 2:

         Captain Kirk would have been all over you like a rash.

         (Link)

         DEAD OF NIGHT 3:

         Though space men are more my kinda thing.

         JULIET:

I want to speak to your superiors. You have taken a member of the UNSC as prisoner without the rights to do so.

DEAD OF NIGHT:

Darlin’ first I ain’t got a clue what a UNSC is. Second as far as anyone but a select few know you’re just a downed weather balloon. Right now I’m the best friend you have.

2. JULIET has thrown her head back connecting with the nose of DEAD OF NIGHT.

         SFX (around the impact)

         CRUNCH.

3. Close up on the cuffs around JULIET’s armored wrists, the chains are taut as she pulls to break them.

         SFX (Around the chain of the cuffs)

         SNAP

4. JULIET now with her hands free turns to face DEAD OF NIGHT. He teeth gritted, her face stern and full of rage. Her hands raised like a boxers ready for a fight.

         NO COPY.

5. DEAD OF NIGHT has pulled his mask off and holds it in his hand. His face is scarred and burnt like deadpools. With his free hand he is wiping blood from his nose, which has already healed. A huge grin has spread across his face.

Flanking DEAD OF NIGHT are a squad of SHIELDWATCH agents. They wear armored suits, the yellow sections are white however and they wear the SHIELDWATCH logo (A shield with an eye on it) on their chests. They are armed with high tech looking rifles, which are all trained on JULIET.

         DEAD OF NIGHT 1:

Don’t worry I’ve been greeted by worse than a broken nose before. I like your fire though. You’re guna need that down here.

(Link)

DEAD OF NIGHT 2:

Escort our young lady visit down to the holding room for me would ya boys.

(Link)

DEAD OF NIGHT 3:

Oh and try to find some better ‘cuffs.

Deadpool -The Other Guy -Dan Hill

NB: So I've used a version of the same character two weeks running...sorry.

But the use of him here was so obvious to me I found it hard to shift my focus from that.

Anyway, the following script uses the 'Pulp' version of the character. There are some minor spoilers as to the origins of that version of the character in the script (nothing too specific though).

PAGE TWENTY


20.1
DEADPOOL (in costume) his sword raised, peers cautiously around a wooden door. We're in a dark and dilapidated Quonset hut.


NB: The differentiation between the two Deadpool/Assailant voices will be done using colours ala the original book. 

1 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 1): I finally found this place. 

2 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 1): The place I was born. 

3 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 2): Woah there chief. The place we were born. 

4 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 1): Shut up. 

5 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 2): I’m hungry.

20.2
Pull out to reveal an ASSAILANT, his back to us, slashing through the wooden door in a downwards arc with his own SAMURAI SWORD. Deadpool dodges to the left slightly. 

6 SFX: SWOOSH

7 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 1): He’s had training. 

8 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 2): I really like his sword.


20.3
Deadpool kicks out at his assailants stomach, sending the attacker hurtling backwards and off balance.


9 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 1): But he’s sloppy. 

10 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 2): Take his sword. 

11 ASSAILANT: Oof


20.4
On Deadpool, sword raised above his head slightly, ready to strike the killing blow.

12 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 2): Are you listening to me?

13 ASSAILANT(O.P): Wade...

14 CAP(DEADPOOL VOICE 2): This rat knows us?

15 WADE: Whatever you’re gonna say, make it quick.  

20.5
On the assailant, giving us our first good look at him. He’s in his early thirties, black hair with a roguish face. But his most striking feature is the sign of a crescent moon carved into his forehead. 

16 ASSAILANT: They didn’t stop...

17 CAP(ASSAILANT): Kill him.

20.6
Zoom into a CLOSE UP on the assailant. 

18 ASSAILANT: They didn’t stop with just you. 

19 CAP(ASSAILANT): Goddamnit, Spector. Stop talking and just kill him.

Deadpool - The Flummoxing Four - Grant McLaughlin

Panel 1 is an inset panel that doesn't take up a ton of space in the top left of the page.  Panel 2 is a splash that takes up the rest of it.

1 - Establishing shot of the Baxter Building.  Daytime.

CAPTION: The Baxter Building.

JOHNNY STORM (from within the building) (1): No.

JOHNNY STORM (from within the building) (2): Absolutely not.

2 - Deadpool stands in a room of the Baxter Building, wearing Sue Storm's old "sexy" costume.  He wears it as a starlet showing off a becoming gown would, although it obviously does not fit him terribly well.  Johnny Storm stands in the same room, exasperated.  He puts a hand to his temple, as if trying to fight off an oncoming headache.

JOHNNY STORM: You cannot join the Fantastic Four!

DEADPOOL (1): Awww!  But you let Spider-Man do it!  And he's already on, like, a Brazilian teams!

DEADPOOL (quietly) (2): Is it 'cuz this outfit makes my butt look big?

Deadpool - Slip and Slyde™ - Ben Rosenthal

1. Deadpool is teleporting into a city. On his wrist is a large device with a timer on it.

DEADPOOL

This slyding™ between realities is getting old.

CAPTION (Deadpool – Yellow)

The Bronie universe was pretty cool.

CAPTION (Deadpool – White)

I still don't know what a Bronie is, but I know the one thing it isn't is cool.

2. Deadpool is looking at the timer on his wrist to see how long he has to stay in this dimension. It reads 00:00:04:34.

DEADPOOL

How long am I here?

Hrm, a quick slyde™ this time.

3. Deadpool is looking at his surroundings, suddenly realising what is different about this reality.  He has seen something down the street and off panel which has him very excited.

DEADPOOL

Alrighty, let's see what this reality is all aboh my lord!

CAPTION (White)

Heh, Perfect Strangers. I loved that show.

CAPTION (Yellow)

Not we didn't, don’t be ridicollos.

4. The streets of the city are clad with female models all in their lingerie. They are looking at Deadpool and are excited.

WOMAN 1

Look! A man!

WOMAN 2

They aren't all dead!

WOMAN 3 (looking worried)

We can still make out with each other though, right?

5. The girls are rushing towards Deadpool, joy on their faces. Deadpool has his arms outstretched. He cannot believe his luck.

DEADPOOL

Sfdfhbfdhjdmndn!

6. Just as the girls start to reach him Deadpool is teleporting away, his time up and off to the next reality.

DEADPOOL

Noooooooooooo

CAPTION (White)

oooooooooo

CAPTION (Yellow)

oooooooooooo!

Deadpool – The Red Green Show – MK Stangeland Jr.

Deadpool – The Red Green Show – MK Stangeland Jr.

(Pool-o-vision. ‘Nuff Said)

(6 Panels)

Panel 1: Location – The Old West. Deadpool stands on one end of a dusty Main Street running through the middle of an old time frontier town, the kind you see in every western ever. Over his traditional costume, he’s wearing a deadpool-themed poncho, a massive sombrero, and has bushy, Mexican-style mustache on the outside of his mask. A tumbleweed rolls across the panel foreground.

SFX: (Music note on each end to indicate that this is ‘background music’ – it’s meant to give the feel of the theme from ‘the good, the bad, and the ugly’ is playing in the background of the scene) Wah-na-wah-na-waaah

DEADPOOL: Hola, el senorita ameiga. Nos es el meeto againo.

YELLOW BOX: Spanish? We don’t speak Spanish!

Panel 2: The other end of the dusty road – SHE-HULK, dressed up in cowgirl garb: blue jeans, shirt and vest, cowboy hat, boots, revolvers in holsters, the works. The tumbleweed from panel 1 has moved to this panel.

SFX: (With music notes, continuing the ‘background music’ from the previous panel) wah-Wah-wah

SHE-HULK: Nice touch.

YELLOW BOX: She can see this?

SHE-HULK: Of course I can.

Panel 3: Close-up on Deadpool. He’s grasping one end of his mustache between two fingers.

SFX (With music notes, continuing from previous panels) Wah-na-wah-na-waaah

DEADPOOL: Et aparece mey tu underestimetio!

YELLOW BOX: No!

YELLOW BOX (2): Hablo!

YELLOW BOX (3): Espn!

YELLOW BOX (4): Yol!

Panel 4: SHE-HULK stands with her arms crossed in front of her. She looks directly at the YELLOW BOX in-panel as she speaks to it directly.

SFX: (With music notes, continued from previous panel) wah-Wah-WAH

SHE-HULK: That doesn’t even sound like real Spanish.

YELLOW BOX: How would you know? Do you speak Spanish?

SHE-HULK: I know enough to tell fake Spanish when I hear it.

Panel 5: DEADPOOL points at SHE-HULK (off-panel) in a dramatic fashion.

SFX: (With music notes, continued from previous panel) Wah-na-wah-na-waaah

DEADPOOL: El stoppo le talko!

Panel 6: DEADPOOL draws a pair of revolvers and fires them – rather than bullets coming out, however, the revolvers are shooting pencils, with the eraser end pointed forward.

SFX: (With music notes, continuing from the previous panel but cut off at the end) WAH-Wah-wah-WrRrRRr!

DEADPOOL: Drenaje!

SFX: BAM! BAM! BAM!

(END PAGE)

Here’s why it’s Deadpool this week!

Greetings, Thought Balloons nerds! It’s your friendly neighborhood Deadpool here!

[I think that title’s taken.]

[Well he’s dead now, so who cares?]

[Isn’t that spoiler material?]

[☠☠☠☠ if I know.]

Do not adjust your web-browser [heh-heh, web], because everything is under control. MY control. I “suggested” Michael take a breather on the ‘Why?’ this week while I hijack his account to tell you why you’re all going to be spending the next week writing about me! [And me.] [But that goes without saying!] Because who could possibly tell you why writing about me for a week is the best thing to ever happen to this site other than yours truly?

See, you may not be aware of this, but I’m awesome. Like the most awesome thing to happen to comics since…EVER! [What about comics being invented?] [*Pfft* - I’m the reason comics were invented!] Why, it wasn’t too long ago that I had about a million books a month coming out. But then they realized that too much Deadpool at once might be hazardous to people’s health since people can only stand so much concentrated awesome at a time. Why, they should probably have put warning labels on those books!

Yeah, I’m so awesome, I pretty much take over anything I show up in. [Include this crummy site?] [ESPECIALLY this crummy site!] Comics? I’m a breakout hit character! That Hulk vs. Wolverine animated movie? Best part of the whole ☠☠☠☠ movie! Video games? Did you not see my appearance in the Marvel Ultimate Alliance titles and how great I was in those? Or have you not yet heard about my own upcoming video game? Starring me?

Though…less said about my appearance in Wolverines movie the better. Even if Ryan Reynolds less than perfect attempt to portray me was probably the best thing to happen to that stinker. [So why even bring it up?] [Because if I didn’t, someone else would.]

Which brings us to Thought Balloons. Now, you people might be small potatoes in the grand scheme of things [Like that last little French fry that sits at the bottom of the fry container thingy] [I think it’s called a frypod], but what self-respecting publicity hog would I be if I didn’t pay a visit to a writing site that dedicates a full week to a new character every week? [Might as well turn in my Overexposed card if I didn’t.] Which is the reason that I’ve been sneaking my way into your scripts as of late, hoping you people might GET THE ☠☠☠☠ HINT!

But you didn’t. Which is why I’ve decided to take more direct action by hijacking your site for the week and giving you no choice but to write a bunch of scripts all about me! So get cracking people, I’ll be waiting to see what you can churn out.

Deadpool’s watching!

Amalgam Comics - Deathpool - Ben Rosenthal

1.  The DC Earth and Marvel Earth colliding in space, showing that the two worlds are amalgamating.

CAPTION (Narrator)

To prevent two Brothers from tearing apart the very fabric of reality a new universe was created.

2. Superman and Captain America are in mid-amalgamation, becoming the Super-Soldier.

CAPTION (Narrator)

A universe combining the greatest heroes of each realm with each other—

3.  Dark Claw is sitting on a rooftop at night.

CAPTION (Narrator)

--creating new and exciting heroes and villains alike.  This would usher in a new era of peace and acceptance throughout all realities.

4. Deadpool and Deathstroke have been amalgamated.  The new character, Deathpool is dressed in Deathstroke’s costume, however the red half is Deadpool’s costume.  Both Deadpool and Deathstroke have voices due to Wade’s insanity, as shown by different coloured speech balloons.   

CAPTION (Narrator)

If it weren't for the combination of two-

DEATHPOOL

So we’re pretty much the same character, right?

Yep.

Rudolph - That Nose - Ben Rosenthal

1.  A snowy night.  Deadpool is crouching in the show.

DEADPOOL

“Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer,

Had a very shiny nose…”

2.  In the distance you can see the slight glow of Rudolph’s nose through the trees and the dark.

DEADPOOL

“And if you ever saw it…”

3.  The full panel is a sound effect – BANG!

4.  Deadpool is walking away, another job completed.  His rifle slung over his shoulder.

DEADPOOL

“You would even say that your target has been eliminated and now it is time for beer.”

The President Of The United States of America - The Day After - Niel Jacoby

Panel 1: The President of the United States, same one as in the real world, sits at his desk, one hand holding his phone to his ear, other hand holding some sort of paperwork he's reading over. He's determined and more occupied with the work at hand than the conversation, but still has a smile on his face. A clock in the background reads 8:30.

Caption: NOVEMBER 7, 2012

PHONE: EVEN THOUGH WE AS A NATION MAY HAVE DISAGREEMENTS AMONG OURSELVES, WE CAN STILL WORK TOGETHER TO SOLVE PROBLEMS WHEN IT REALLY COUNTS. I'VE GOT TO SAY I'M GLAD WE HAVE A PRESIDENT WHO TRULY UNDERSTANDS THAT.

POTUS: ME TOO, CAP. AND I ALWAYS DID LOOK UP TO YOU.

Panel 2: Same mileu as the first, different paperwork, same expression, 8:50.

PHONE: VERILY, I KNOW NIGH LITTLE OF THINE MORTAL POLITICS, BUT THEY SEEM A DAMN SIGHT HARDER THAN SIMPLY KILLING THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE VILLAGE TO OBTAIN DOMINANCE OVER HIS LAND AND WOMEN. I DOFF MY WINGED CAP TO THEE, AS THOU HAST CONQUERED A SYSTEM I FALL SHORT OF EVEN UNDERSTANDING, NOT ONCE BUT TWICE. BUT EVEN YOU HAVE NOT KNOCKED OUT THE TEETH OF THE MIDGARD SERPENT WHILST THOU WEREST EVEN IN ITS OWN MOUTH, SO AS MY COMPATRIOT CLINT BARTON WOULDST SAY, "NEENER NEENER".

POTUS: YOU EVER DEAL WITH A TICKED-OFF HILLARY CLINTON?

PHONE: ...

POTUS: I REST MY CASE.

Panel 3: Same general environs as the 1st and 2nd, 9:16. The president is looking a bit annoyed.

PHONE: LISTEN, BUB, EVEN THOUGH YA GOT TA BIN LADEN BEFORE I HAD THE CHANCE, I DON'T HOLD IT AGAINST YA.

PHONE(SMALLER): LOGAN! THE PRESIDENT IS A BUSY MAN AND DOESN'T NEED THE HASSLE OF YOU CALLING HIM ALL THE TIME! LET HIM GET BACK TO HIS JOB!

PHONE: *SIGH* FINE, KITTY. I'LL LET THE PRESIDENT GET BACK TO WHAT HE WAS DOING.

POTUS: YOU'D BETTER LISTEN TO HER, LOGAN. SHE SEEMS LIKE SHE'S GOT A BETTER HEAD ON HER SHOULDERS THAN YOU DO.

PHONE: AH, WHADDA YOU KNOW? YOU DON'T HAVE ADAMANTIUM BONES.

Panel 4: 10:02. The president doesn't even look like he's listening, just going through the paperwork.

PHONE: HEY BARRY, THIS IS DEADPOOL. I JUST WANTED TO SAY, FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART--

Panel 5: 10:03. The president has the phone at arm's length, and is calling out to the other room.

PHONE(Much louder than before): BABA BOOEY BABA BOOEY HOWARD STERN'S PENIS!

POTUS: ANYONE KNOW IF WE CAN JUST BLOCK ALL CALLS FROM CANADA FOR THIS PHONE? MAYBE REDIRECT THEM TO DIAMOND JOE? ANYONE?