Scott Pilgrim - Vs. The Evil X-Boyfriends - Rol Hirst

Panel One.

Scott and his friends are drinking in a dingy club.

WALLACE: So what you’re telling me is this NEW girl, she really IS the woman of your dreams.

SCOTT: Totally, dude. Ramona and all her crazy ex’s… that was just way too much trouble.

Panel Two.

Close on Scott, beer bottle in hand, chatting excitedly.

SCOTT: But Emma… Emma’s like uber-sexy… she dresses like you wouldn’t believe…

SCOTT: It’s like she knows exactly what I’m thinking the whole time we're together… AND she utterly, utterly digs guys named Scott.

Panel Three.

Wider shot. Scott’s sister Stacey comes over. She’s pointing behind her.

STACEY: Sco-ott… there’s some guys here want a word with you.

Panel Four.

Scott looks over in the direction Stacey's pointing, his eyes going wide. Wallace covers his own eyes with a hand.

SCOTT: Gulp!

WALLACE: I’ve got a very bad feeling about this.

Panel Five.

Approaching the table is a group of seven angry individuals. Among them: Sebastian Shaw of the Hellfire Club, Prince Namor the Submariner, Tony Stark (in his Iron Man armour)… and Scott Summers, his visor burning red. Three other characters are seen in shadow only, two men and a woman, just to get the fanboys in a stir because bi-sexuality is, like, SO exciting… if you haven’t left your mum’s basement in the last seven years.

CYCLOPS: Scott… Pilgrim?

Panel Six (set inside panel five).

Headshot of Wallace, peeping out between his fingers.

WALLACE: And… here we go again.

Scott Pilgrim –V EC Horror V 80’s Video Games – Ryan K Lindsay

1. Scott Pilgrim is sitting up on a dirty floor. He has just woken up, he looks groggy, there’s little *’s circling his head.

Caption: Your name is Scott Pilgrim and the last thing you remember is Ramona screaming.
Caption: It sounded like she might have seen a monster...or a monster sale.

2. Scott is standing up and looking around him.

Caption: Either way, she is now gone and you are all alone.

3. Scott is walking down a long hallway.

Caption: You’d only come to fill out a prescription with Dr West. You’d had trouble sleeping. The wetness had returned.

4. Scott has come across some creepy little red things that bounce along the floor and look like they’d possibly form a piranha frenzy around your ankles.

Caption: But now you’ve lost your girl, you’ve lost your way, and if you are seeing those creepy little things you might well have lost your mind.

5. Scott has rounded a corner and there’s a pedestal with a down light above it. On the pedestal is a creepy red mask, its face is plain, it looks like a red gimp mask.

Caption: You see the Terror Mask and you know you have only one choice.

6. Scott is looking down to see a metal pole suddenly in his hand, I’d imagine this as a low angle shot.

Caption: Scott Pilgrim, welcome to the Splatterhouse.
Caption: We’ve got fun and games.
Caption: You’ve got a bitchin’ metal pole.

Scott Pilgrim - Vs The World Warrior - Ben Rosenthal

This page has 6 panels. Make them fit however you wish.


The following takes place at some point.


1. Scott Pilgrim and Ramona Flowers are walking hand in hand. From Scott’s pocket is a tiny ‘breep’ sound effect, as he has received a message on his phone.

RAMONA
When did you get a cell?

2. Close up of the mobile screen. It reads:

Mr Pilgrim, It has come to my attention that you are dating my girlfriend Ramona Flowers. Prepare to fight.


3. Scott is looking at Ramona, his mobile still in his hand.

SCOTT
I thought you only had seven evil ex-boyfriends.

RAMONA
I did....

RAMONA
Oh, wait, there was this one guy who was obsessed with me. He was convinced that we were dating when we never were.

SCOTT
What was his name?

4. The same panel, however Scott and Ramona are looking straight ahead, eyes wide. There is a “THWOMP” sound effect over their heads, as something has just landed right in front of them.

ROMONA
Ken.

5. This panel shows what the two are looking at. It is Ken Masters from Street Fighter 2. He is dressed in his red Gi. He is tightening his black belt, ready to face Scott in combat.


6. Same panel of Scott and Ramona, with Scott’s hand waving nervously. Scott looks both star struck and frightened (very wide eyes).

SCOTT
How do, Ken.

Scott Pilgrim - Vs. The Evil Monthly Subscription Service - Matt Duarte

Scott Pilgrim in “Scott Pilgrim Vs. The Evil Monthly Subscription Service” by Matt Duarte

This scene takes place shortly after the end of the sixth Scott Pilgrim book (don’t worry, no big spoilers). It is set up in seven panels. First three go on the first row, the two after that in a second row, and the last two on a third row.

Panel 1

Description: Scott and Ramona are sitting in a table in their living room. Ramona looks slightly worried while Scott looks confident as he makes a hand gesture pointing at himself.

RAMONA: Scott, there’s been a slight complication. You are going to have to fight my eight evil ex.

SCOTT: No worries, Rammy. After Gideon, this will be a piece of cake!

Panel 2

Description: A reaction shot of Scott as he learns the shocking news, his eyes are wide open.

RAMONA (Off-panel): Um... right. Did I mention he is a Level 80 Warlock?

Panel 3

Description: Ramona’s hand is pointing at a computer in a desk in the living room.

Ramona ...in World of Warcraft.

Panel 4

Description: Still in the living room. Scott looks confused, and Ramona looks embarrassed, her cheeks red.

SCOTT: Wait a minute, how do you know this guy again?

RAMONA: I met him in one of my guild’s raid.

SCOTT: You played WOW?

Panel 5

Description: Still in the living room. Scott now looks meditative, as if thinking to himself, while Ramona is clearly frustrated.

RAMONA: Look, I had just broken up with Gideon and I was bored so I started playing, and I dated him through there.

SCOTT: I didn’t know you could do that...

RAMONA: Are you going to fight him or not?

SCOTT: Sure, sure.

Panel 6

Description: Scott is now dynamically punching the computer, breaking it, and making dozens of gold rings pop out (like in Sonic games)

Panel 7

Description: Scott is walking away, dusting his hands off, looking very pleased.

SCOTT: Easiest battle so far!

The End

Why Scott Pilgrim?

Because, in simple words, this is Scott Pilgrim's finest hour. Not only did the sixth installment of the series come out in the past month, to critical acclaim and great sales, but there's also the movie adaptation that is being released this very week upon unsuspecting masses, and an old school video game tie-in. Whichever one is your preferred media, Scott Pilgrim has got you covered.

I also chose him because so far we have had all characters from Marvel and DC, and I liked that this would present a challenge to my fellow ThoughtBallooners. Not everyone has read all of the books, and that's fine, because no one has read every Superman or Iron Man appearance either. The character also lends itself to comedy, something that is harder to write in a single one page script.

But most of all, I want to see who is the first one that does "Scott Pilgrim: Noir". Stay tuned this week for more of Scott Pilgrim vs. Thought Balloons!

Scott Pilgrim is a character created and owned by Brian Lee O'Malley. Please don't sue us, Mr. O'Malley!